17

I am censored. Be it how I speak, the way I speak it, or who I speak it to.  I do not think the same anymore. My writing is censored. It is well thought out so I do not offend or upset. At times I get overwhelmed by how much I feel a hand over my mouth but then I remember that I allow it to be there and I cave in again. 

But I know who I am - censored or not. I know what I feel and I know what I think. I know that the Lord is with me in my thoughts and actions everyday and so if I am humble than I am humble before the Lord and no one else. That is a hard thing to remember being the person that I am. And as I type I already feel re-assured that one day I will feel like "me" again; whether that be the old me or the new, and I won't find that kind of acceptance anywhere else but in my God.

I am your servant and you hear my cry.